Some folks see Pink Elephants but . . .

The Portland Dragon

Just to let you know that a Dragon has been operating in the Gurnard area over the weekend.

It first appeared in Cowes during the sailing regatta, and it has now been seen breathing fire at a house in Tuttons Hill and outside of the Portland, the pub which Mark Spencer, Chris Colley, Colin Downer and myself frequent with our partners and anyone elses partner.

Legend has it that the Dragon had leather trousers and was once a drummer with Jimmy's Big Fish and the Jones'. Breathing great flames and belching fire the Dragon has evaporated into thin air. Apparently at approxamately 12.15am on Tuesday morning a retired policeman living in the flats across from the Portland telephoned the police stating that a Dragon was fire breathing.

On arrival the police found nothing except a few singed hairs from a human leg. (Bikini lines were not recommended.) The police have apparently given up the search already as the trail went cold half way down Church Road.

Captain Chaos